Thursday, 16 April 2015

The Land of the Writerly.

Shanelle and I have been talking lately about how many users on Mibba have been claiming that the site is "dead" - something that I, in my state of inactivity, had not picked up on, but that she has come to agree with.

I am no stranger to "dead" sites. I used to read and write on until all of the authors I was following drifted away; I was a staff member on the old before they closed off the archive and started it all fresh. Both sites began to slow down towards the end. To many of their members, they were "dead". And when a site falls this way, I usually find myself moving on to another without even thinking about it. It's a sort of natural reaction, I suppose. 

This time I haven't even considered moving on. Mibba and Wattpad, despite the fact that I have yet to really become active on the latter, have become my writing homes online. So when Shanelle said that she agreed with the other users, that she feels the sites are dying too, I didn't know what to think. For a while, it killed my creative spirit. 

It made me want to stop writing. 

And therein lies the realisation that I have been lying to myself, and lying to my readers for years. I write for myself. But if I only write for myself, why have I always felt the pressure of uploading and updating my works online? If I only write for myself, why would it matter that these sites were dying? 

I love my readers. I love their comments, their feedback, their undying loyalty to the stories that I have told over the years. But this is the first time that I have realised I can't stand the thought of writing without them. 

I write for myself, but I also write for an audience. 

I have since reminded myself why I love writing so much, and I know I will continue no matter what happens to these websites. And that is a good feeling.

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